They say "Life is like... " a lot. I find this funny, though I have been know to spin a philosophical tale as well. How can life be like something else when everything all combined is life. Or maybe I just don' t know what life is like. Or what life is. Or something. Whatever.
It does seem to me, of late, that a lot of people I know are not happy with life no matter what we say it is like. Whether this is just me opening my eyes to the world around me or just how things are now, I'm not sure. Of that, I'm certain. That I'm not sure. I think.
Life is like...
being out to sea.
Being out to sea can be calm peaceful at moments, rough and unpredictable at others. Beautiful and dangerous. Alluring and frightening. (It sounds like I'm talking about a woman, and perhaps that is why the ocean steals many a mans heart.) There are assumptions that we can make, patterns that we can recognize, yet there is no certainty. We can look at our charts and weather forecasts, we can watch the wave tips and telltales, we can feel the subtle shift of the breeze on our face, or we can hear how the wind rushes over the sails. The ocean will not an can not be tamed. It's all we can do but to make the best of what we know and what we have. At the same time, it's important to know that we have the ability to change course. To change our sails. When the sea is still and there's barely a breeze, we drop the jib and hoist the spinnaker; when the ocean is volatile, we reef the main, secure our harness to the life line and plot the best course we can. We don't control the wind or the sea, but we can adjust our sails and course. Control what you can, and understand what you can't control. What is your course, how are your sails set?
What is your destination?
When do you want to get there?
How will you know when you have arrived?
When you get there, what fantastic things will you find there?
What resources, (crew, boat, charts, experience...) can you call on to get you there? How can you put those to their and your best use?
What can you do RIGHT NOW to begin the journey?
Maarburg (dreaming of the sea)
Current meatspace coordinates:
Lost at sea... for now.
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Friday, March 13, 2009
Friday, December 05, 2008
I’ll start tomorrow
I often make jokes about how I should start a Procrastinators Club, maybe tomorrow. Procrastination is often one of those simple things that stands between where we are, and where we want to be. Perspective, being one part of overcoming a stuck behavior pattern, is often the best place to start.
Words
The words we use, in thought and speech, are considerably more important than we tend to realize. Our choice of words, not only explains our perspective on things, is often shapes that perspective as well. If you’ve had problems with motivation and/or procrastination, take a moment to examine the words you use to define the problem.
Do you use use phrases like “have to” and “should” ? Most of us do. Let’s take a look at these common phrases and I’ll tie the perspective the provide/create and how it interacts with procrastination.
“Have to” is such a commonly used phrase that we might miss how dangerous it can be. You don’t have to do anything. When we say that, we are somehow taking the task and removing our acceptance of it. It ends up feeling like it’s forced on us from someone else, someone that has power over us. That power, that choice, to do something is yours, and has always been so. There are consequences for not doing things, yet the choice is yours. You don’t have to go to the gym. You either want to, or you don’t. Strip that phrase out of your speech patterns, and replace it with ‘want to’ and ‘choose to’ or if you’re adventurous, ‘looking forward to’. On to “should”… Says who? Who exactly are you letting choose your values, and direction in life? Who is telling you what you should do? Silly me, I thought you were in control of your life. Interesting.
Focus
I find my procrastination takes hold when the task is too large for me to see all the parts. In fact, there are a ton of things that I’ve put off doing, simply because I couldn’t see past the next big decision. One of the most important lessons I took from David Allens’ book Getting Things Done, is that the first step, is actually asking what is the next possible action. What is the next thing you can do? Slice down big projects or problems into smaller easier to manage pieces.
Expectations
Right behind changing your focus from the monstrous, to the minute, is redefining what you think success means. The higher the expectation, the more pressure you are putting on yourself. This often leads to “have to” and “should” sneaking into your language. You may or may not be familiar with the Pareto Principle, named as such, but you’ve surely heard of the 80/20 rule. I spin on this principle is that the closer you get to 100%, or perfection, the more time/effort/resources are needed to gain every percentage point. It is considerably easier to move from a 59% perfect project to a 60% perfect project than it is to get from 95% to 96%. Step back and look at what is really necessary for the project to be a success. Reassess how vital this project is, and to whom. Seek the perfection in the smaller slices of the project, and you will often see a better overall project.
Fun
Life - by it’s very nature seems to indicate that we will end up doing things that we would rather not. Bouncing back up to “have to” vs “choose to”, remember that you have the choice. If you’re going to do this thing that you’d rather not, you might as well try to make the best of it. Have fun with it. Name your files after characters from a movie, anthropomorphize the project or parts of it. Whatever you can do to smile while you’re working.
Sorry.. my rambling didn’t produce a nice little mnemonic for remembering the steps. I could go back and change them, but I’m not.
Maarburg- meatspace N 21 18.759 W 158 1.072 Elevation 35m
Words
The words we use, in thought and speech, are considerably more important than we tend to realize. Our choice of words, not only explains our perspective on things, is often shapes that perspective as well. If you’ve had problems with motivation and/or procrastination, take a moment to examine the words you use to define the problem.
Do you use use phrases like “have to” and “should” ? Most of us do. Let’s take a look at these common phrases and I’ll tie the perspective the provide/create and how it interacts with procrastination.
“Have to” is such a commonly used phrase that we might miss how dangerous it can be. You don’t have to do anything. When we say that, we are somehow taking the task and removing our acceptance of it. It ends up feeling like it’s forced on us from someone else, someone that has power over us. That power, that choice, to do something is yours, and has always been so. There are consequences for not doing things, yet the choice is yours. You don’t have to go to the gym. You either want to, or you don’t. Strip that phrase out of your speech patterns, and replace it with ‘want to’ and ‘choose to’ or if you’re adventurous, ‘looking forward to’. On to “should”… Says who? Who exactly are you letting choose your values, and direction in life? Who is telling you what you should do? Silly me, I thought you were in control of your life. Interesting.
Focus
I find my procrastination takes hold when the task is too large for me to see all the parts. In fact, there are a ton of things that I’ve put off doing, simply because I couldn’t see past the next big decision. One of the most important lessons I took from David Allens’ book Getting Things Done, is that the first step, is actually asking what is the next possible action. What is the next thing you can do? Slice down big projects or problems into smaller easier to manage pieces.
Expectations
Right behind changing your focus from the monstrous, to the minute, is redefining what you think success means. The higher the expectation, the more pressure you are putting on yourself. This often leads to “have to” and “should” sneaking into your language. You may or may not be familiar with the Pareto Principle, named as such, but you’ve surely heard of the 80/20 rule. I spin on this principle is that the closer you get to 100%, or perfection, the more time/effort/resources are needed to gain every percentage point. It is considerably easier to move from a 59% perfect project to a 60% perfect project than it is to get from 95% to 96%. Step back and look at what is really necessary for the project to be a success. Reassess how vital this project is, and to whom. Seek the perfection in the smaller slices of the project, and you will often see a better overall project.
Fun
Life - by it’s very nature seems to indicate that we will end up doing things that we would rather not. Bouncing back up to “have to” vs “choose to”, remember that you have the choice. If you’re going to do this thing that you’d rather not, you might as well try to make the best of it. Have fun with it. Name your files after characters from a movie, anthropomorphize the project or parts of it. Whatever you can do to smile while you’re working.
Sorry.. my rambling didn’t produce a nice little mnemonic for remembering the steps. I could go back and change them, but I’m not.
Maarburg- meatspace N 21 18.759 W 158 1.072 Elevation 35m
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)